Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal!
Do you always burn your pizza?
I’m not afraid anymore. Do you hear me? I’m not afraid!
I’m 10 years old. TV is my life.
You can mess with a lot of things, but you can’t mess with kids on Christmas.
My name is Kevin McCallister. I live at 671 Lincoln Boulevard. My phone number is 555-5246. I’d like a lotta dollars, please.
Is this toothbrush approved by the American Dental Association?
You can be too old for a lot of things, but you’re never too old to be afraid.
I hope you don’t mean that the way it sounds.
1992, alright. New Year’s Eve. There’s gonna be a party! I’ll be there!
No offense, but that seems like a stupid thing to do during Christmas vacation.
I just went to the store and back. Everything’s fine.
The French don’t even have a word for ‘entrepreneur.’
I’m living alone. I’m living alone! I’m living alone!
You can’t kidnap someone on Christmas, you nugget!
You give me that ticket or I’ll snap your neck like a twig!
It’s not every day you see a kid beat the living daylights out of a couple of bad guys.
Bird lady? You can’t be serious!
This is it! This is my chance to make things right!
Come and get me, you big horse’s butt!
Well, let me know if you see anybody sticking needles in their face.
You’re not like every other person in this world. You’re different. And I’m different too.
I’m just one person who happened to hear it. I vow to help you. You’re not alone anymore.
Why talk to a palm reading jerk when I can get the real thing?
Sure there’s a room. You just have to go across the street and up a couple of numbers.
Excuse me, ma’am, but I’m looking for Duncan’s Toy Chest.
You can mess with a lot of things, but you can’t beat kids on Christmas.
Don’t I know you from somewhere?
Two scoops, sir? Four, if you can manage it.
It’s a hotel, sir, not a charm school.
We don’t have an extra room. We only have a suite.
What kind of idiots do you have working here?
That is not what I said. I said, I wasn’t afraid anymore.
When I grow up and get married, I’m living alone!
Great, great! Look, I’ve had enough of you two. You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to call the police!
Mr. President, Mr. President. We’re speaking on an untraceable telephone.
Crack seed?
Can I trust you with a secret?
You’re really weird and I like you a lot.
There’s a feeling here and Christmas is the best time to have it.
He’s our son. And we love him.
Goodnight, Macaulay Culkin!
Christmas isn’t just a day. It’s a frame of mind.
Just because you’re a family doesn’t mean you have to like each other.
Goodbye Turtle Doves!
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