Burn, burn, burn like fabulous Roman candles!
I’m not insane. My mother had me tested.
I said good day!
Let’s put the ‘ass’ back in class!
Whoa! Kitty’s got a fat ass!
I’m not crazy, my mother had me tested.
My name is Michael Kelso and I love to party!
You can’t see California without Marlon Brando’s eyes.
Hey, hey, hey! It’s time to smoke some weed!
I’m totally worthless, but at least I have a girlfriend.
The point of a party is to have fun, not to sit around and whine about your feelings.
Screw the future, I wanna live a dangerous life now!
Men invented words like ‘honorable’ so they could get away with doing whatever they want.
Breaker breaker, this is the Red Leader, come back!
Eric, you can’t make a dog feel better by wrapping a Band-Aid around him.
Donna, you are badass in every sense of the word.
If this is the best Earth has to offer, I’m going to conquer another planet.
No insults, Jackie, I have a reputation to uphold.
Why wear clothes when you can wear your birthday suit?
What’s the minimum IQ to become a cheerleader?
Ladies, gentlemen, and cheerleaders, allow me to introduce myself.
Kelso, stop using your brain powers so irresponsibly!
I am the law! You hear me? I am the law!
I don’t need your pity! I have my own pity party every day!
The cow says ‘Moo,’ the pig says ‘Oink,’ and the Kelso says ‘Burn!’
It’s not that I dislike work, I just prefer not doing it.
I’m a lover, not a fighter. Unless someone says something mean about my mommy, then I’m a fighter.
Life’s a wheel. Eventually, we all end up on the bottom.
Sometimes you have to roll the hard six.
I’m not a loser, I’m just not a winner.
I am not dumb, okay? I like words, I just get them mixed up in my head.
I’m just a guy with a lot of thoughts and not enough storage space.
I’m not a failure, I’m just still practicing success.
Why fit in when you were born to stand out?
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success.
I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
The only way to do great work is to love what you do.
I want to put a ding in the universe.
Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower.
Your time is limited, don’t waste it living someone else’s life.
The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.
Stay hungry, stay foolish.
Every great dream begins with a dreamer.
I have not failed. I’ve just found ways that don’t work.
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