Ted movie quotes

Ted: Have you accepted Ted as your snuggly bear and personal savior?

Ted: Don’t worry, I’m like a tampon. I’ll take care of it.

Ted: I’m not a great swimmer, but I excel at doggy paddling.

John: Ted, you’re my thunder buddy for life.

Ted: If I had a penis, I’d be the first one to sit down when I pee.

Ted: I may not be a smart bear, but I know what love is.

Ted: I’m just a teddy bear, standing in front of a girl, asking her to love him.

Ted: Life is full of surprises. Like the time I found out I could use a bong as a hat.

John: Ted, you’re like the best friend a guy could have.

Ted: You don’t need drugs when you have a talking teddy bear.

Ted: Time flies when you’re having fun. Or when you’re high on pot.

Ted: I may not be a real boy, but I’ve got a real heart.

Ted: I may not have a lot of fur, but I’ve got a lot of love.

Ted: Just because I’m a teddy bear doesn’t mean I can’t party.

Ted: If life gives you lemons, make a bong out of them.

Ted: Who needs a job when you can be a professional mischief-maker?

Ted: Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably crap.

Ted: I’m not a normal teddy bear. I’m a cool teddy bear.

Ted: If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. And then beat ’em at their own game.

Ted: The key to happiness is a bong, some buddies, and a lot of laughs.

Ted movie quotes part 2

Ted: Life is like a jigsaw puzzle. Sometimes, you just have to force the pieces together.

Ted: I’m not fat, I’m fluffy. And cuddly. And awesome.

Ted: Love is like a bong hit. It hits you right in the feels.

Ted: Life is too short to be taken seriously. Embrace your inner child and have fun.

Ted: I may not have a driver’s license, but I’m a master of the remote control.

Ted: Don’t judge a teddy bear by its fluffy exterior. I’m full of surprises.

Ted: I don’t need a magic carpet to find adventure. I’ve got my imagination and a talking teddy bear.

Ted: Love is like a joint. It can be a rollercoaster of emotions.

Ted: Life is a wild ride. Hold on tight and enjoy the journey.

Ted: I may not have opposable thumbs, but I know how to have a good time.

Ted: Real friends stick together, even when the going gets tough.

Ted: Life is like a box of chocolates. It’s best enjoyed with a friend.

Ted: I may not have a job, but I’ve got an important job of making people laugh.

Ted: Don’t worry about the future, just enjoy the present moment.

Ted: I may not have a college degree, but I’m a master of mischief.

Ted: Love is like a teddy bear. It’s soft, comforting, and always there for you.

Ted: Life is like a bong hit. Inhale the good, exhale the bad.

Ted: I may not have a lot of possessions, but I have a heart full of love.

Ted: Friends are like joints. They make everything better.

Ted: Life is too short to hold grudges. Let go and embrace forgiveness.

Ted: I may not have a job, but I’ve got a lot of life experience.

Ted: Love is like a bong. It can take you to new heights.

Ted: Life is like a comedy show. You never know what’s going to happen next.

Ted: I may not be the smartest bear, but I know how to have a good time.

Ted: Love is like a rollercoaster. It has its ups and downs, but it’s always an adventure.

Alfred Sorsazo

A seeker of inspiration and beauty in words. I share quotes that touch the soul, provoke thought, and inspire change.

Finding and sharing wisdom that helps you better understand yourself and the world around you. Why quotes? Short phrases contain incredible power - they can inspire, support, give hope, or just make you smile.

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