Here I sit, broken-hearted. Tried to poop, but only farted. No job is finished until the paperwork is done. I pee on the seat, I aim to please. Employees must wash hands, but unicorns are exempt. If you sprinkle when you tinkle, please be neat and wipe the seat. Don’t…
QuoteSkull Posts
Happy birthday to my favorite smoker! May your day be filled with the perfect blend of celebration and relaxation. Wishing a very happy birthday to a smoker who always knows how to light up a room! Happy birthday to a smoker who always knows how to keep things interesting! Wishing…
Happy birthday to someone who has earned my utmost respect and admiration! May this special day be filled with joy, laughter, and all the things that make you happy. Happy birthday, and thank you for being a wonderful example of how to live life with honor and dignity. Wishing a…
Life is just peachy with you around. You’re a peach of a friend. You’re the cream in my peach cobbler. This day is as sweet as a peach with you by my side. Peachy keen, jellybean! You’re sweeter than a Georgia peach. You make every day peachy. Everything is just…
Happy birthday! May your special day be filled with love, joy, and happiness. Here’s wishing you a very happy birthday! May all your dreams and wishes come true. May your birthday be as wonderful as you are! Wishing you all the best on your special day. Happy birthday to someone…
Bourbon: because sometimes beer just isn’t strong enough. Life is too short to drink bad bourbon. I have mixed drinks about feelings… and bourbon helps too. Bourbon is the perfect mix of sweet, smooth, and strong. In a world full of plain vodka, be a spicy bourbon. Bourbon: liquid gold…
I put the man in manly. Real men wear pink. And occasionally, a cape. I’m not lazy, I’m energy efficient. I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right. I’m not short, I’m just concentrated awesome. I’m not balding, I’m just tall hair challenged. I’m not fat, I’m just easy…
Tickle me Elmo! Elmo loves you! Elmo’s World! Elmo wants to know! Elmo is happy to see you! Elmo’s got a question for you! Elmo thinks you’re awesome! Elmo loves to learn! Elmo is a happy monster! Elmo is curious about everything! Elmo loves to play! Elmo’s laughter is contagious!…
Life is just a bowl of cherries. Cherry on top of the cake. Cherry-pick the best. Cherry bombs bursting in air. Sweet as a cherry. Cherry blossom season. Cherry red lipstick. Cherry cola cravings. Cherry on the sundae. Cherry-rific! Cherry picking memories. Cherry pie perfection. Cherry juice stains. Cherry brandy…
Coffee is the answer, but I can’t remember the question. Life is too short for bad coffee. Without coffee, I’m basically a zombie. Coffee makes everything better. I never have a bad day when I start it with coffee. Coffee is a hug in a mug. Rise and grind with…
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