Funny You Owe Me Money Quotes

I may not have a calculator, but I can still add up all the money you owe me.

Do we need to start a GoFundMe for you to pay me back?

I thought being friends meant we were supposed to share everything, including your debt.

I hope I don’t need to hire a collection agency to get my money back.

It’s like the universe is playing a cruel joke by making you owe me money.

I didn’t realize we were playing Monopoly with real money, and you were the banker.

If I had a dollar for every time you owed me money, I could retire early.

Do you have a ‘IOU’ bookmark for the chapter of our friendship where you owe me money?

I should start charging you interest on all the money you owe me.

You’re lucky I don’t charge a late fee on overdue debts.

Some people collect stamps, but I collect IOUs from you.

You could start a Guinness World Record for the longest time someone has owed me money.

You owe me so much money, I should start introducing you as my loan shark.

At this point, I just assume you’re using me as your personal ATM.

If I had a penny for every time you owed me money, I would probably be broke too.

I have a feeling that instead of giving me money back, you’re going to give me an excuse.

You must be allergic to paying me back because you always seem to break out in excuses.

I’m starting to think your wallet is like a black hole where money goes to disappear.

I need to start carrying a receipt book to keep track of all the money you owe me.

If you owe me money, does that make me a loan officer in our friendship?

I hope you’re keeping track of all the money you owe me because I’ve lost count.

I’m starting to think you’re auditioning for the role of ‘Worst Debtor of the Year.’

I should start offering a discount for friends who pay me back on time.

I’ll have to add ‘debt collector’ to my resume because of you.

I don’t know if I should be more concerned about the money you owe me or our friendship.

I’m one step away from starting a payment plan for you to repay me.

I bet there’s a whole universe of alternate realities where you actually pay me back.

I’m considering opening a lemonade stand to fund my endeavors of getting my money back.

If only I could pay my bills with all the excuses you give me for not paying me back.

I hope you’re saving up for retirement because it looks like you won’t be paying me back anytime soon.

I didn’t know my friendship had such a high cost, but now I have your debts to prove it.

I should send a bill every time you ask me for a favor, just to balance our friendship’s financial equilibrium.

Instead of splitting the bill, it seems like I’m always splitting your debt.

I’d love to donate to your ‘Paying off Debts’ charity, but unfortunately, I’m the one who needs donations.

I’m starting to feel like a charity for your never-ending financial troubles.

It would be funny if it wasn’t so frustrating how you constantly owe me money.

I thought winning the lottery meant I would finally get all the money you owe me, but it looks like my luck has run out.

If I had a dollar for every excuse you’ve given me for not paying me back, I could probably pay off your debt.

When it comes to paying me back, it seems like you’ve mastered the art of disappearing.

You must have a special talent for racking up debts because you always seem to owe me money.

I hope you’re taking notes on how not to repay a debt because you’re setting a new standard.

You’re like a magician with money. It disappears whenever it’s time for you to pay me back.

I wish I could turn your debt into gold because it seems to be piling up faster than any treasure.

If being in debt was an Olympic sport, you would definitely take home the gold.

I never realized being your friend came with a financial commitment, but here I am, waiting for you to pay me back.