- I put the man in manly.
- Real men wear pink. And occasionally, a cape.
- I’m not lazy, I’m energy efficient.
- I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.
- I’m not short, I’m just concentrated awesome.
- I’m not balding, I’m just tall hair challenged.
- I’m not fat, I’m just easy to see.
- I don’t need a haircut, I need a beard trim.
- I may be a handful, but at least you’ll have two.
- I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis.
- I’m not old, I’m a classic.
- I’m not lost, I’m exploring.
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee person.
- My wife says I don’t listen to her… or something like that.
- I have a degree in sarcasm.
- I can’t adult today, I need a nap.
- I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving my energy for later.
- I’m not stubborn, I’m determined.
- I’m not arguing, I’m just passionate.
- I’m not weird, I’m a limited edition.
- I’m not rude, I’m just honest.
- I’m not crazy, I’m just enthusiastic.
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a midnight warrior.
- I’m not old, I’m just experienced.
- I’m not anti-social, I’m selectively social.
- I don’t snore, I dream I’m a motorcycle.
- I’m not single, I’m just saving myself for someone who deserves me.
- I’m not late, everyone else is just early.
- I’m not a doctor, but I’ll take a look.
- I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.
- I’m not anti-social, I’m just socially selective.
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a zombie until I have my coffee.
- I’m not bald, I’m just taller than my hair.
- I’m not fat, I’m just cultivating mass.
- I’m not clumsy, I’m just performing my own stunts.
- I’m not short, I’m concentrated awesome.
- I don’t have a dad bod, I have a father figure.
- I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong.
- I’m not forgetful, I’m just preoccupied.
- I’m not a procrastinator, I’m a strategic delayer.
- I’m not ignoring you, I’m just prioritizing my daydreams.
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee achiever.
- I’m not a procrastinator, I’m just creatively efficient.
- I’m not fat, I’m just big-boned.
- I’m not a superhero, but I play one in my dreams.
- I’m not in shape, I’m just trying to reduce my carbon footprint.
- I’m not clumsy, I’m just allergic to gravity.
- I’m not rude, I’m just speaking my mind.
- I’m not crazy, I’m just a little unwell.
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a serial snoozer.
- I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving my energy for when I need it.
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a breakfast enthusiast.
- I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right
- I never finish anythi
- I can’t adult today
- I put the ‘pro’ in procrastination
- I’m not lazy, I’m energy efficient
- I’m not short, I’m concentrated awesome
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee person
- I can’t keep calm, I have anxiety
- I have a degree in sarcasm
- I’m a lover, not a fighter. But I will fight for what I love
- I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m always right
- I’m not bossy, I just have better ideas
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee person
- I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving my energy
- I have a PhD in procrastination
- I may be wrong but I doubt it
- I’m not arguing, I’m just passionately expressing my point of view
- I’m not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
- I’m not short, I’m fun-sized
- I’m not stubborn, I’m just committed to my opinions
- I can’t adult today, I need a nap
- I’m not lazy, I’m just highly efficient
- I have the memory of a goldfish
- I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right…again
- I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong
- I’m not bald, I’m just taller than my hair
- I’m not old, I’m just chronologically gifted
- I’m not fat, I’m just easy to see
- I’m not lazy, I’m just saving my energy for something important
- I’m not always sarcastic. Sometimes I’m sleeping
- I’m not arguing, I’m just stating the facts as I see them
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a noonish person
- I’m not lazy, I’m energy efficient
- I’m not grumpy, I just don’t enjoy fake conversations
- I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong
- I’m not short, I’m just concentrated awesome
- I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right
- I’m not arguing, I’m just passionately expressing my opinion
- I’m not opinionated, I’m just always right
- I’m not grumpy, I’m just conserving my energy
- I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving my energy
- I’m not arguing, I’m just passionately debating
- I’m not arguing, I’m just passionately stating my opinion
- I’m not always right, but I’m never wrong
- I’m not always grumpy, I’m just selective with my conversations
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a coffee person
- I’m not bald, I’m just follicly challenged
- I’m not always right, but I’m usually pretty close
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