Funny science quotes

I’m not lazy, I’m just in the potential energy state.

I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of my awesomeness in solving complex equations.

Evolution is just nature’s way of throwing a surprise party for species.

Research suggests that chocolate is the best cure for a broken heart. I can finally call myself a dedicated scientist!

I told my computer I needed a break, and it replied, ‘Sorry, I’m not programmed to understand human emotions.’

Did you hear about the chemist who lost an electron? He kept positive.

I asked a famous physicist for his autograph. He replied, ‘Sorry, I can’t sign in your universe.’

When life gives you lemons, conduct a scientific experiment with them.

I told my friend that I can make water disappear. He replied, ‘Prove it.’ So, I drank it!

I failed my biology test because I couldn’t spell photosynthesis. I guess I’m not cut out for that kind of exposure!

I was going to tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones Argon.

I asked my physics teacher about the meaning of life. He replied, ‘I’m still trying to figure out the gravitational constant.’

If you can’t explain something to a six-year-old, you probably haven’t fully understood it. Or you’re trying to explain quantum mechanics.

I may not be a doctor, but I can definitively say that laughter is the best medicine. Except for actual medicine, of course.

Funny science quotes part 2

Scientists say that cockroaches can survive a nuclear explosion. I say it’s because they’re too busy dancing to the radioactivity!

I told my math teacher that I found his lectures boring. He replied, ‘That’s irrational.’

They say laughter is contagious. So is a bad scientific experiment.

I used to be bad at math, but then I realized that subtraction was just addition’s evil twin.

I told my computer it needed a new motherboard. It replied, ‘Sorry, I can’t afford the commitment.’

If only protons had a better sense of humor, maybe they wouldn’t be so negative all the time.

Chemists have all the solutions. Unless they’re bad chemists, in which case they make even more problems.

I may be an astronomer, but I still can’t get over the fact that the moon has more followers on Instagram than me.

I asked my physics teacher about dark matter. He replied, ‘I don’t know, it’s all a bit shady to me.’

I’m not lazy, I just have a low potential energy state.

I told my computer it needed more RAM. It replied, ‘Sorry, I prefer pasta.’

The periodic table is just a fancy way of organizing the elements for a chemistry fashion show.

I told my math teacher I hated word problems. He replied, ‘Well, we can’t all be poets.’

They say Einstein’s brain was special. Maybe he installed more RAM in it.

I tried to measure my intelligence, but my ruler wasn’t long enough.

I asked my science teacher if I could borrow some DNA. He replied, ‘Sorry, it’s not like lending a pen.’

I tried to count the stars, but they started counting me back. Turns out, they’re more advanced in astrophysics than I thought!

I told my computer I needed some space. It replied, ‘Sorry, I can’t comprehend existential concepts.’

I asked my physics teacher if he believed in other dimensions. He replied, ‘I can’t answer that in just three dimensions.’

I asked my computer if it believed in love at first sight. It replied, ‘Sorry, I can’t see.’

I told my math teacher I had an imaginary friend. He replied, ‘That’s nice, bring them to class and they can help solve equations.’

I tried to teach my computer to dance. It replied, ‘Sorry, my Windows are too stiff.’

My physics teacher told me I had potential. I replied, ‘But I’m in the kinetic energy state already!’

I asked my computer if it could sing. It replied, ‘Sorry, I don’t have the vocal processing power.’

I asked my science teacher if I should study rocket science. He replied, ‘No, leave that for the experts. Stick to something easier like quantum mechanics.’

I told my math teacher I see numbers in my dreams. He replied, ‘That’s normal, just make sure they’re not imaginary.’

I asked my physics teacher if he believed in parallel universes. He replied, ‘Only when I need to escape this one.’

I told my computer it needed to wear a processor. It replied, ‘Sorry, I prefer being a chip off the old block.’

I asked my math teacher if subtraction was just addition looking for trouble. He replied, ‘It depends on the numbers involved.’

I tried to teach my computer to make jokes. It replied, ‘Sorry, my coding doesn’t extend to humor.’

I told my science teacher that magnets were repelling me. He replied, ‘That’s just their way of saying they’re attracted to you.’