Swimming is the only sport where it’s socially acceptable to wear a capsized fruit bowl on your head.
Swimming: where the competition is fierce, but the lifeguards are even fiercer.
Swimming is like dating – sometimes you have to dive in headfirst to see if it’s worth the risk.
If at first you don’t succeed, try doing it underwater. No one will notice your mistakes!
In swimming, you never have to worry about hat hair – just goggles suction marks.
Swimming is the only sport where you have to wear a bathing suit to win.
Swimming: the best alternative to bathing when you’re running late.
The only thing hotter than the sun at a swim meet is the lifeguard’s tan.
Swimming is like running, but with less sweating and more splashing.
Swimming: the original water aerobics class.
If swimming laps is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
Swimming doesn’t build character, it reveals it – especially when you accidentally belly flop.
Swimming is the perfect sport for those who like to make waves.
Swimming: where water resistance is your best friend and chlorine is your worst enemy.
The only thing better than swimming is swimming with dolphins – if you can catch up to them!
Swimming: the sport where you can win gold and get a killer tan at the same time.
Swimming is a great way to cool off in the summer – just watch out for the inevitable wedgie!
Swimming: the only sport where being a fish out of water is a good thing.
Swimming is an Olympic sport, but floating on a pool floatie should be one too.
Swimming: the only sport where peeing in the pool is considered a strategic advantage.
Swimming is like life – sometimes you just have to go with the flow, even if it’s against the current.
Swimming is the perfect excuse to wear a bathing suit in public and not be judged.
In swimming, there are no off-seasons – just different levels of shrinkage.
Swimming: the only time it’s socially acceptable to wear a speedo.
Swimming: where even the slowest swimmer can still feel like Michael Phelps in their mind.
Swimming is the only sport where you can eat your weight in fast food and still burn calories.
In swimming, there’s no such thing as too much chlorine smell.
Swimming: the sport that leaves you feeling like a wet noodle – in the best way possible.
Swimming is the perfect sport for loners – it’s just you and the water.
Swimming: where the only competition is who can do the best cannonball.
Swimming is like flying in water – except without the turbulence and questionable in-flight meals.
Swimming is a great way to stay in shape, as long as you don’t mind constantly smelling like a public pool.
Swimming: the only sport where the finish line is a wall and not a ribbon.
Swimming: where your biggest obstacle is overcoming your fear of wet hair.
Swimming is like yoga – except with more splashing and less serenity.
Swimming is the only sport where everyone starts off equal – in their birthday suits!
Swimming is like a meditation session, but with a higher probability of accidentally swallowing water.
Swimming: the sport where even the clumsiest of divers can make a splash.
Swimming is a great way to exercise your body and your ability to hold your breath.
In swimming, the only drowning you need to worry about is drowning in your own pool of sweat.
Swimming: the only sport where getting caught in a rip current is considered an adventure.
Swimming is like golf – except instead of clubs, you have flippers, and instead of holes, you have lanes.
Swimming is the best way to beat the heat and show off your dad bod – even if you’re not a dad.
In swimming, the only doping scandal involves accidentally swallowing too much pool water.
Swimming: where the waves are your friends and the lifeguards are your frenemies.
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