Zoolander quotes

I’m pretty sure there’s a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking.

Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty.

Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?

I feel like I’m taking crazy pills!

What is this? A center for ants?

I’m not an ambi-turner. It’s a problem I had since I was a baby. I can’t turn left.

A model’s life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features doesn’t mean that we too can’t not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.

I’m a hand model, mama. A finger jockey. We think differently than the face and body boys… we’re a different breed.

Oh, I’m sorry I can’t turn left, Derek!

You can derelick my balls, Capitan.

I can’t turn left!

Stay out of my way, or you’ll pay. Listen to what I say.

I have only one look, it’s Blue Steel.

You is talkin’ loco and I like it!

You’re a joke, Derek! You’ll never be a real man!

I’m sorry that good-looking people like us made you throw up and feel bad about yourself.

What is this? No, I can’t do this. Actually, I can’t do this. I’m sorry.

I make this look good.

Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features doesn’t mean that we too can’t not die in a freak gasoline fight accident.

Zoolander quotes part 2

I’m pretty tired. I think I’ll go home now.

How can we be expected to teach children to learn how to read if they can’t even fit inside the building?

I learned that the hard way.

I wasn’t like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree.

You have no evidence.

Sorry babe, I’m an ambitious girl.

Your moves are just passé, copper-top.

Maybe I can bring them in through the side door.

Or would you like to wrap your lips around my timepiece?

I am a hand model, damn it! I have feelings!

I’ll call you later, just give me your number.

God, you’re so annoying!

You think you’re too cool for school, but I’ve got some news for you, Walter Cronkite…

I could’ve been a male model if I hadn’t been born with this debilitatingly good looking face.

I’m sorry that good-looking people like us made you throw up and feel bad about yourself.

I can derelick my own balls, thank you very much.

But why male models?

What have you done, Derek? You’ve done nothing!

You’re dead to me, boy! You’re more dead to me than your dead mother!

Mugatu is so hot right now he could take a crap, wrap it in tinfoil, and sell it to Gwyneth Paltrow as a detox snack.

I thought you were joking, but I see now that you were perfectly serious. Excuse me while I go kill myself.

I’m sorry I was born with this perfect bone structure!

I can’t turn left!

I became a hand model at the age of sixteen; I guess I just had a good hand.

I happen to be an aspiring architect myself, you know.

It’s a walk-off!