I am McLovin.
You know you’re going to do something stupid, right?
I am the liquor.
I love fucking parties.
I am the coolest person that ever existed.
We are like the Justice League of getting pussy.
You don’t want to take advice from me on getting laid. I’ve been called an idiot several times.
I hope you’re not using a condom, because I want to know when I’m paying for your abortion.
I just want to dance with some sluts.
I’m like the LeBron James of… having sex with chicks.
I am the master of my own domain.
I am the master of my own destiny.
I am the master of my own pleasure.
I just want to go to sleep so I can wake up and get high.
I’m having a tough time with math. My dick gets in the way of my counting.
I got a fake ID. It says that I’m 25 and that I’m the organ donor of a 68-year-old man.
I’m a fucking genius. Seriously, it’s a miracle you guys even knew me before the whole ID thing.
I’m not a nerd, I’m a lover.
I’m not trying to be a hero. I’m just trying to get some ass.
I have no game with chicks. I’m just a dork who quotes movies all the time.
I’m like Picasso with a bong.
I’m like the Jimi Hendrix of dick.
I’m like a human Thesaurus of profanity.
I’m like Tony Stark, except without the billions of dollars, the genius intellect, and the Iron Man suit.
Top Superbad Quotes that Will Make You Laugh part 2
I’m like a living, breathing, sex machine. Well, at least in my dreams.
I’m like a Jedi Knight, but instead of a lightsaber, I have a bong.
I’m like the Don Juan of the dinosaur world.
I’m like the Ryan Gosling of the youth group.
I’m like the Tom Cruise of getting wasted and acting like an idiot.
I’m like the Michael Phelps of smoking weed.
I’m like the Steve Jobs of getting laid.
I’m like the Shakespeare of sexting.
I’m like the Mozart of partying.
I’m like the Elon Musk of getting high.
I’m like the Barack Obama of beer pong.
I’m like the Adam Sandler of falling in love with fictional characters.
I’m like the Beyoncé of seduction.
I’m like the Justin Bieber of bad decisions.
I’m like the Marilyn Monroe of not giving a fuck.
I’m like the Eminem of getting high and drunk.
I’m like the Johnny Depp of pretending to be interesting.
I’m like the Leonardo DiCaprio of forever trying to grow a beard.
I’m like the Kanye West of thinking I’m the shit.
I’m like the Chris Hemsworth of wishing I had a British accent.
I’m like the Ryan Reynolds of cracking jokes that only I find funny.
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