South Park Quotes – A Collection of Humor, Social Commentary, and Memorable Lines

Screw you guys, I’m going home. – Eric Cartman

Respect my authoritah! – Eric Cartman

Oh my God, they killed Kenny! – Stan Marsh

You bastards! – Kyle Broflovski

I learned something today… – Various characters

Simpsons did it! – Butters Stotch

What’s the big deal? It doesn’t hurt anybody. Fuck you, asshole! – Mr. Mackey

Hippies, they’re everywhere. They wanna save the Earth, but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad. – Eric Cartman

I’m not fat, I’m big boned! – Eric Cartman

I don’t trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn’t die. – Mr. Garrison

If I have to read one more lame-ass book… I’m gonna puke! – Eric Cartman

When you’re an atheist, taking the Lord’s name in vain is redundant. – Eric Cartman

Ugh, I hate Family Guy. Way too many cutaway gags. – Stan Marsh

Stan, you know, we never should have trusted dolphins. They think they’re so smart. – Kyle Broflovski

You know, I learned something today. Screw you guys, I’m better off alone. – Eric Cartman

You can’t have your cat back, I’m sorry. But, on the other hand, I have some good news: you’re about to make 60 bucks. – Eric Cartman

There are times when growing up, means you just gotta risk it. – Stan Marsh

South Park Quotes – A Collection of Humor, Social Commentary, and Memorable Lines part 2

You know, I’ve learned something today… screw you guys, I’m going home. – Eric Cartman

Stan, don’t you know the first law of physics? Anything that’s fun costs at least eight dollars. – Kyle Broflovski

What seems to be the officer, problem? – Eric Cartman

I take no pleasure in your pain. In fact, I envy you. – Stan Marsh

God forbid your horny lives get in the way of Bentley’s. – Randy Marsh

We’re sorry, we just feel it’s time to tighten things up around here. – Stan Marsh

That’s it, screw you guys. I’m gonna go home! – Eric Cartman

You know, I’m not a kid anymore. I’m a full-grown man, and I can’t just sit at home and eat hot pockets all day. – Kenny McCormick

Don’t blame me, blame society. – Eric Cartman

Whatever, I’ll do what I want! – Eric Cartman

I’m not fat, I’m festively plump! – Eric Cartman

I’m going to make love to the beaver. – Randy Marsh

I hate this school! All my problems started here! – Eric Cartman

Tegridy Farms, where we put Tegridy first. – Randy Marsh

Sometimes life is more important than money, Stan. – Randy Marsh

This is America, we eat hamburgers, not frogs. – Stan Marsh

You go to hell and you die! – Eric Cartman

It’s called the circle of life, Kenny. – Stan Marsh

I’m not a failure, I’m just not good at it. – Eric Cartman

You thought love was roses, but you realize love is a cruciferous vegetable. – Randy Marsh

I’m not a fat asshole, I’m a sensitive soul. – Eric Cartman

You know, I’ve learned something today… screw you guys, I’m going home. – Eric Cartman

I don’t have anger issues, I have idiot issues. – Eric Cartman

I can’t fix stupid, but I can fix ugly. – Dr. Alphonse Mephesto

You know what they say, mean people suck. – Officer Barbrady

I didn’t get a ticket. I got a warning. I’m not fat. I’m big-boned. – Eric Cartman

I’m not just sure, I’m HIV positive! – Mr. Garrison

You can change the world, just don’t get killed. – Butters Stotch