Funny Quotes for the Weekend

Weekends are like superheroes – they swoop in and save us from the monotony of the workweek.

I love the weekends because they give me the opportunity to do all the things I didn’t have time to procrastinate during the week.

Weekends are like chocolate – they make everything better.

I may not be an astronaut, but on the weekends, I explore the universe of my couch.

Weekends are so short, it’s like they’re on a diet.

On the weekends, I have a black belt in Netflix-watching.

Weekends: the best time to reenact scenes from your favorite movies in the comfort of your own home.

I like to pretend that weekends are like mini vacations, except without the exotic locations or relaxation.

Weekends are the perfect time to catch up on all the sleep I didn’t get during the week… and then promptly oversleep.

Weekends: the only time it’s socially acceptable to wear your pajamas all day.

The best weekends are the ones that leave you wondering how it’s already Sunday night.

Weekends are like rainbows – they brighten up even the cloudiest of days.

Weekends are the perfect time to contemplate all the exercise I didn’t do during the week.

Nothing makes me happier than realizing it’s the weekend and I don’t have any plans.

Weekends are a great time to practice my Olympic sport: napping.

Weekends are a great time to pretend that doing chores is an optional activity.

Funny Quotes for the Weekend part 2

Weekend goals: to be as relaxed as a cat in a sunbeam.

My weekend hobby is convincing myself that I’ll be productive, and then not being productive at all.

Weekends are proof that life isn’t all about work and responsibilities… until Monday rolls around.

Weekends are the time to ignore all the adulting I have to do and embrace my inner child.

Weekends are a great time to catch up on all the TV shows and movies I’ve been pretending to watch.

Weekend forecast: 100% chance of pajamas and zero percent chance of adulting.

Weekends are like a breath of fresh air after holding your breath all week.

I believe in a religion called ‘Sunday Funday’.

The only bad thing about weekends is when they end and Monday rolls around.

Weekends are for making memories… and forgetting them by Monday morning.

Weekends are the perfect time to contemplate all the life decisions that led me to being on my couch.

Weekends are like unicorns – everyone talks about them but they’re actually quite elusive.

Weekends: the perfect excuse to wear your Superman pajamas and pretend you can fly.

On the weekends, I’m not lazy – I’m in energy-saving mode.

Weekends are like alarm clocks – they remind you that life has a snooze button.

Weekends are my favorite time to practice my Olympic sport: socializing with my cat.

Weekends are a great time to catch up on all the books I haven’t read and probably won’t read.

Weekends are the ultimate time to indulge in all the guilty pleasures you’ve denied yourself during the week… like eating an entire pizza by yourself.

Weekends are a reminder that even the most chaotic workweeks have an expiration date.

Weekend math: Saturday + Sunday = a lifetime of happiness.

Weekends are for trying to remember what life was like before the Monday-Friday grind.

Weekends are a great time to work on my most important project: becoming a professional couch potato.

Weekends are like blank canvases – the possibilities are endless, but I’ll probably just end up binge-watching a TV show.

Weekends are a time to solve all the world’s problems… at least in my head.

Weekends are a great time to overthink every decision I’ve made in my life.

Weekends: the perfect time to vow to be productive and then take a three-hour nap.

Weekends are like fingerprints – everyone’s is different, but they’re all special in their own way.

Weekends are the best time to make plans and then cancel them at the last minute.

Weekends: the perfect time to wear your optimism like a crown and leave your worries behind.