Arrr, me hearties! A merry life is a treasure worth havin’!
Why did the pirate go to school? To improve his ‘arrrrrrr’tithmetic!
To err is human, but to arrrr is pirate!
Why did the pirate become a chef? He wanted to serve up a taste of treasure!
I’m not a pirate, I just have a lot of ‘arrrrr’titude!
Why did the pirate bring a ladder to the bar? He heard the drinks were on the house!
How do pirates know they are pirates? They think, therefore they arrr!
What’s a pirate’s favorite letter? ‘Arrrrrrr’rrr!
Why was the pirate always on time? He had a hook on his watch!
Yo ho ho and a bottle of puns! That’s how real pirates have fun!
Who would make the best pirate dentist? Cap’n Crookedtooth!
Why are pirates excellent singers? They hit all the high ‘arrrrrrr’s!
What’s a pirate’s favorite kind of music? Seasick shanties!
Where do pirates go for a drink? The sand bar!
Why did the pirate’s parrot bring a map to the party? It wanted to ‘X’ marks the spot for treasure!
What’s a pirate’s favorite exercise? Burying the treasure – it’s great for the abs!
Why did the pirate always carry a jar of peanut butter? He loved to spread the Jolly Ranchers!
Yo ho ho, and a bottle of rum – unless you’re underage, then it’s just a bottle of coke!
What do you call a pirate with two eyes, two hands, and two legs? A rookie!
Why did the pirate refuse to play cards with the jungle animals? He heard they were all cheetahs!
What did the pirate say when his wooden leg got stuck in the freezer? Shiver me timbers!
What’s a pirate’s favorite iPhone app? ‘Aye-Tunes’!
Why did the pirate bring a baseball bat to the treasure chest? He wanted to hit a home ‘rrrrrrr’un!
What’s a pirate’s favorite accessory? A hookstume jewelry!
Why did the pirate take up gardening? He wanted to grow some buried treasure!
Why did the pirate bring a ladder on a sailing trip? In case he wanted to ‘board’ something!
What’s a pirate’s favorite movie genre? Swashbuckling comedies!
Why don’t pirates like to use email? They prefer to send messages in a ‘bottle’!
What’s a pirate’s favorite kind of cookie? Ships Ahoy!
Why did the pirate get a parrot as a pet? He wanted someone to ‘squawk’ his jokes!
What do you call a pirate who became a lawyer? A sea-ster at law!
Why don’t pirates go to the movies? They prefer ‘plunder’ on Netflix!
What did the pirate say when he found out he aced the math test? ‘Eye’ did it!
Why was the pirate’s car always breaking down? It had a bad case of ‘carrrrrrrburator’ trouble!
What’s a pirate’s favorite type of sandwich? B’L.T. – Bacon, lettuce, and treasure!
Why did the pirate start a bakery? He wanted to make some ‘dough’!
What’s a pirate’s favorite sport? Sailing – it’s a high ‘arr’stivity!
Why did the pirate bring a mop to the bar? He heard it was full of ‘swab’ stories!
When is a pirate not a pirate? When he’s feeling ‘shiver me witters’!
What’s a pirate’s favorite musical instrument? The harrrrrrrp!
Why don’t pirates ever go on vacation? They can’t find a mate-y!
What’s a pirate’s favorite day of the week? ‘Frrrriday’, of course!
Why did the pirate bring a ladder to the concert? He wanted to ‘climb’ to the top of the charts!
What’s a pirate’s favorite type of dog? A ‘Goldendooaaarrrrrrrrrrg’!
Why did the pirate join the circus? He wanted to ‘arrrr’obat around!
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