- I’m not slurring my words, I’m speaking in cursive.
- Life is too short to drink bad beer.
- Wine not?
- This coaster is not big enough for both of us.
- Keep calm and drink on.
- Alcohol you later!
- I can resist anything except temptation.
- Beer is always the answer.
- Trust me, you can dance – beer.
- I have mixed drinks about feelings.
- Cheers to the freakin’ weekend!
- Everything in moderation, including moderation.
- Drink responsibly, but not too responsibly.
- In dog beers, I’ve only had one.
- Drink like a fish, swim like a champion.
- Vodka is my spirit animal.
- Tequila may not be the answer, but it’s worth a shot.
- Save water, drink beer.
- Keep your friends close and your drinks closer.
- I drink, therefore I am.
- You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy wine and that’s pretty much the same thing.
- I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right – with a drink in my hand.
- Alcohol may not solve your problems, but neither will water or milk.
- A good drink is like a hug in a glass.
- I’m not a wine snob, I’m a wine enthusiast.
- You had me at merlot.
- I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis.
- Friends don’t let friends drink bad wine.
- I only drink on two occasions: when it’s my birthday and when it’s not.
- Drinking wine is like eating sunshine and happiness.
- A hangover is just your body reminding you that you had fun last night.
- Life is too short for bad coffee and bad wine.
- Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
- When in doubt, add more wine.
- Alcohol – because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad.
- I have a drinking problem – I can’t afford it.
- A glass of wine a day keeps the stress away.
- Coffee keeps me going until it’s time for wine.
- I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a drinking solution.
- I’m not a wine snob, I’m a wine critic.
- Drink up, buttercup!
- Drinking wine is like taking a mini-vacation for your soul.
- I’m not drunk, I’m just speaking my truth.
- It’s always happy hour somewhere.
- Life is too short to drink bad wine or to waste a good buzz.
- Wine is like duct tape – it fixes everything.
- I only drink on days that end in “y”.
- I have a love-hate relationship with alcohol – we love each other but it hates my liver.
- Beer is my happy place.
- Champagne is always a good idea.
- I’m not a quitter, I’m just pacing myself.
- Life is too short for bad wine and boring conversations.
- Coffee in the morning, wine in the evening – the perfect balance.
- Drink wine and chill.
- I have a drinking problem – my glass is empty.
- I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a wine enthusiast with a drinking problem.
- Wine a little, laugh a lot.
- Life is too short to drink bad whiskey.
- Drinking wine is like adulting with a twist.
- Drink up, buttercup, and let the good times roll!
- Drink wine and pretend you know things.
- I drink to make other people more interesting.
- Beer is not just a drink, it’s a lifestyle.
- It’s always a good time for a drink.
- Wine improves with age, I improve with wine.
- This drink is not going to drink itself.
- I’m not drunk, I’m just pleasantly buzzed.
- Coffee, because adulting is hard. Wine, because adulting is harder.
- The only time I drink responsibly is when I’m responsible for pouring the drinks.
- I drink therefore I am…hungover.
- Wine is my favorite four-letter word.
- Life is too short to drink cheap beer.
- Coffee keeps me going until it’s acceptable to drink wine.
- I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a connoisseur.
- A drink a day keeps the stress away.
- I have a strict policy of never drinking before it’s noon somewhere.
- There’s always time for one more drink.
- Drinking wine is like a journey to the soul.
- I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer to be with friends.
- There’s no such thing as too much wine…only not enough glasses.
- Life is too short for bad coffee and cheap wine.
- I’m not drunk, I’m just being me but louder.
- Coffee, because it’s too early for wine…unless it’s brunch.
- Beer: because sometimes one drink just isn’t enough.
- Wine: because sometimes one glass just isn’t enough.
- Drink like a pirate, dance like a mermaid.
- I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a professional drinker.
- A glass of wine a day keeps the whine away.
- Coffee keeps me going until it’s time for beer.
- Drinking wine is like a hug in a glass.
- Life is too short for bad cocktails.
- I’m not drunk, I’m just taking advantage of the happy hour.
- You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy beer and that’s pretty close.
- Wine not have another glass?
- I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer to be fancy.
- There’s nothing a good drink can’t fix.
- Drinking wine is like a symphony for the senses.
- I’m not an alcoholic, I’m just really good at drinking.
- It’s always happy hour somewhere in the world.
- Life is too short to drink bad tequila.
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