Oh, I’m sorry. Did my sarcastic tone confuse you? It must be so hard to understand sarcasm.
Please, tell me more about how your problems are so much more important than anyone else’s.
Oh, of course. It’s totally my fault that you can’t take a hint and leave me alone.
Wow, congratulations. You’ve managed to reach a new level of stupidity. Impressive.
Oh, please enlighten me with your profound wisdom. I’m dying to hear it.
I’m so sorry that my lack of enthusiasm for your boring story is ruining your day.
Oh, I’m just thrilled to be stuck in traffic with morons like you. Truly a highlight of my day.
I can’t wait to hear more about your amazing life. It must be fascinating being so self-absorbed.
Oh, look who it is – the eternally clueless. How’s that working out for you?
I’m sorry, is your massive ego blocking the sun? It’s hard to tell from down here.
Oh, thank you for sharing your valuable opinion that no one asked for. Truly enlightening.
I’m amazed at how you manage to consistently lower the bar for basic human decency.
Oh, please continue to complain about your insignificant problems. I couldn’t care less.
Yes, please keep talking. I’m sure the sound of your voice will cure my insomnia.
Wow, you must be the voice of reason. Or maybe you’re just really good at stating the obvious.
I can’t believe I have to explain this to you, but sarcasm is a defense mechanism against stupidity.
You must be the life of the party with all that charisma and charm. Or not.
Oh, great. Another unsolicited opinion from the resident know-it-all. How original.
I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that your opinion was more important than facts.
Oh, please enlighten us all with your extensive knowledge on a subject you clearly know nothing about.
I’m sorry, is your arrogance supposed to impress me? Because it’s not working.
Yes, please tell me again how amazing you are. It’s not like I’ve heard that a thousand times before.
Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was in the presence of such a genius. My mistake.
Yes, please continue to complain about how hard your life is. It’s riveting.
You must be a real joy to be around with that endless negativity and sarcasm. Truly delightful.
Oh, I’m so sorry. Did I hurt your fragile ego? Maybe you should try growing a thicker skin.
Yes, because I definitely care about your opinion. You must be so important.
Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize I was supposed to be entertained by your constant need for attention.
Oh, look at you, trying so hard to be clever. Too bad it’s not working.
Please, continue to blame everyone else for your own mistakes. It must be so satisfying.
Oh, please tell me again about how much smarter you are than everyone else. It’s fascinating.
I’m sorry, is your arrogance supposed to impress me? Because it’s not working.
Yes, please keep talking. I’m sure the sound of your voice will cure my boredom.
Wow, you must be the expert on everything. Or maybe you’re just really good at being obnoxious.
I can’t believe how lucky I am to have you grace me with the presence of your constant negativity.
Oh, I’m so sorry. Did I hurt your delicate feelings? Maybe you should try not being so sensitive.
Yes, because your opinion is so important and relevant. Please, tell me more.
Oh, please continue to complain about how unfair life is. It’s such a refreshing perspective.
You must be a real blast at parties with that charming personality of yours. Or not.
Oh, I’m sorry. Did I interrupt your self-pity party? Please, carry on.
Yes, please keep talking. I’m sure the world needs to hear your endless wisdom.
Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize you were the authority on everything. My bad.
Please, tell me more about your amazing accomplishments. I’m on the edge of my seat.
Oh, look who it is – the resident expert in everything. How fascinating.
I’m sorry, I didn’t realize I was in the presence of such a superior intellect. My apologies.
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