Best Michael Scott Quotes

Sometimes I’ll start a sentence, and I don’t even know where it’s going. I just hope I find it along the way.

Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

I am Beyoncé always.

I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.

I am running away from my responsibilities. And it feels good.

I have no problem speaking in front of large groups of people. I love it.

I love inside jokes. I’d love to be a part of one someday.

Sometimes I’ll start a sentence and I don’t even know where it’s going. I just hope I find it along the way, like an improv conversation.

I’m an early bird and I’m a night owl. So I’m wise and I have worms.

I’m not a hero. I’m a high-achieving salesman in a paper company.

I am ready to face any challenges that might be foolish enough to face me.

It is mind-boggling to me that there are people who wake up every morning and decide to be normal.

Would I rather be feared or loved? Um, easy both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

Sometimes you have to take a break from being the kind of boss that’s always trying to teach people things. Sometimes you just have to be the boss of dancing.

I knew exactly what to do, but in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.

I wonder what people like about me? Probably my jugs.

Best Michael Scott Quotes part 2

I don’t hate it. I just don’t like it at all and it’s terrible.

Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate. So he’s not really a part of our family. Also, he’s divorced, so he’s really not a part of his family.

There are certain lessons in life that can only be learned, Erlang Shen.

I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.

Jim and Pam are going to have a huge wedding, and I don’t mean size-wise. I mean… I mean… world’s largest.

The worst thing about prison was the… was the Dementors. They were flying all over the place and they were scary and then they’d come down and they’d suck the soul out of your body. And it hurt!

Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don’t know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally, I’ll hit somebody with my car. So sue me.

I would say I kind of have an unfair advantage because I watch reality dating shows like a hawk, and I learn. I absorb information from the strategies of the winners and the losers.

I’m not usually the butt of the joke. I’m usually the face of the joke.

I don’t care what they say about me. I just want to eat.

I’m sorry, did I stutter? Keep it up and you’ll lose your job. That’s the stuttering I did. Not actual stuttering, but… That was a good one.

I have a lot of questions. Number one: how dare you?

Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.

There’s a lot of beauty in ordinary things. Isn’t that kind of the point?

I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.

I love catching people in the act. That’s why I always whip open doors.

Sometimes I’ll start a sentence and I don’t even know where it’s going. I just hope I find it along the way.

I guess I’ve been working so hard, I forgot what it’s like to be hardly working.

Well, it would’ve been nice if someone could have alerted me to the situation so that I wouldn’t have been blindsided by it!

I don’t want somebody sucking up to me because they think I’m going to help their career. I want them sucking up because they genuinely love me.

Remember, if I am harsh with you, it’s only because you’re doing it wrong.

It takes an advanced sense of humor. I don’t expect everybody to understand.

I don’t have a lot of experience with vampires, but I have hunted werewolves. I shot one once, but by the time I got to it, it had turned back into my neighbor’s dog.

And I knew exactly what to do, but in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.

It’s a pimple, Phyllis, Avril Lavigne gets them all the time and she rocks harder than anyone alive.

I mean, they’re just so intelligent and loyal and obedient and… Who am I supposed to like?

Do you think doing alcohol is cool?

I am declaring bankruptcy!

Nobody should have to go to work thinking, ‘Oh, this is the place that I might die today.’ That’s what a hospital is for.